Once, I was put on a word ban. Not a swear word but I did ask mum the meaning of a particular word one time, knowing full well the answer! Not a good exchange.
The word banned was ‘struggle’. Fairly innocuous perhaps, but in my case, defining.
It was also generative. Each time I used ‘I struggle with…’ all I did was generate an assessment in others that I wasn’t confident, that I found things hard, that I wasn’t assertive etc etc. I certainly wasn’t generating assessments of capability
Add in a tilt of my head and one might conclude that I was undermining myself. So, my head had to come upright when I spoke as well.
The point is that our very language shapes and reveals something about who we believe ourselves to be, and generates beliefs in others about who we are.
So too does the way in which we move and hold ourselves. Our bodies communicate all of the time. My head tilted on one side maybe telling you that I am listening, it may be saying I’m curious, or I’m not a threat, or it might be saying ‘I’m really not sure’.
Whenever we show up we reveal who we are – loudly, or subtly, but we reveal. We just don’t always take the time to put it into words – it’s just there until we decide to pay attention
Does this resonate for your leadership?