Image by Christopher Ross from Pixabay
“Back Off!” “No!” or any such words that declare a boundary. Personal boundaries and their actual physical violation have been in the news recently as we know.
Boundaries can be hard - to declare, to maintain, or get support for, sadly.
There are spaces in which boundaries remain fuzzy, sometimes usefully, but often, our stories get in the way of us declaring a boundary. Who we will be if we do so, how will we be perceived, can we really do that, does it align with who and how society tells us we ‘should’ be?
We begin to learn about boundaries as children - where we can and can’t assert, how and where we must mould, even sacrifice for the sake of adults on whom we rely and the society within which we operate.
When we become adults do we need to relearn how to reclaim our boundaries? Certainly it seems that women have some reclaiming to do; I don’t think they are alone.
I’d challenge anyone reading this post to not find at least one domain of their life where a firmer boundary is not needed. I coach in this, yet I could easily find areas of my life in which a clearer boundary would be better.
What do you think – are people generally skilful at boundaries – and by skilful, they can declare and hold them with respect and care for mutual dignity?
