“I had to go for a swim before I called him to tell him what he could do with his ‘suggestion’. A swim in open water on a sweltering hot day was literally cooling off time in more ways than one!”
Conversations are vital, underpinning the root of our connection with others. Video conferencing and masks produce different conversations; more patience, less interruption, clearer speech.
The swim helped clear his head, and he was able to look beyond what he was assuming, consider what hadn’t been said. They ended on the same page, a new understanding created, the gaps filled in. Is this how conversations go?
Sadly not always. Often we listen to persuade. You speak, I speak, each of us listening for an angle. We rarely listen from a mood of genuine, open curiosity.
Did you know that each time we are ‘proved right’ we get a dopamine hit? Addicted to being right is a real thing.
In a complex world where much is being re-thought, taking people with us will only happen through the conversations we have. Those that listen to connect, expand our thinking, to engage in power with not power over
Can you tell when someone is listening just to be right, when they are listening to connect, or simply not listening at all?